So you think you're cool huh

Oh gosh. I think this post has been long overdue. It's about Facebook! Yeah I know you crackheads have been expecting this shit from me, especially from me and you're just holding your big pile of anticipation right under your collective bosoms.

Ah yes, Facebook. The name itself is a mystery, much less the people who use it. Why Facebook? I had the weirdest visual when I first heard it on the radio somewhere. I mean, we had Friendster in the good ol' days which I have an account on (no I am not linking it) but after sometime, some chinese with tits for a brain decided it was cool to post up pictures of themselves cutting their wrists like moronic suicidal failures. No, seriously. It's not cool to show people what you spend your time doing using that sad excuse for a brain. How you take pictures of only your big cute eyes and none of your face. Why would I wanna look at pictures of eyes? Especially when you get a little too happy with your black eyeliner. And what's with the bleeding wrists? Dude, if you really want hits on your profile, a picture of your attempting suicide by shoving jellybeans and bleach down your throat with a fork have a much better chance compared with a picture of you with a bleeding wrist. It's such a vagina thing to do.

So Friendster I view no more.

Anyway, back to the topic. I succumbed into the pressure of having high-school friends and made myself an account to see what's the hype about. I mean, I heard of people actually staying up all night just to see updates on their friends. How caring! :)

Yeah so at first, when you don't have a lot of people to stalk, or what they call friends, its really boring. As in REALLY boring. All I did was stare at my profile and the only thing I had in my mind was WHATAFACK AM I DOING? Uh huh but it gets better because there are fan pages. Oh how I love the fan pages. Its actually very entertaining to watch your friends 'Become A Fan' of the RANDOMEST things.

Here's one I just had to laugh at:

*Looks in freezer, "OMG ICE CREAM!! ;D", *opens, "W.T.H? CHICKEN? D:<.."

Sure there are other stupid ones that can only be a product of a pre-pubescent hormonal 13 year old that puzzles me. Why would you want to become a fan of something like THAT? *RAGE* Like, "Saying it's fine when I'm not". How can you actually be a fan of THAT? Basically, you're just advertising how often you lie. Now, when I want to express my concern to someone I have to think twice because he/she just became a fan of saying it's fine when they're not.

"Stop teasing Justin Bieber. She has feelings too" This is so bull. Maybe I'm being biased because his songs are painfully catchy but come on. He ain't that bad. He's young and enjoying his life. Just because you fail at whatever he's doing doesn't mean you have to hate. There are always other things you can do like using your powerful foreign language skills to become a dishwasher at some fancy hotel.

Ridiculous.

Till then.

Strange

Yesterday, I was in Sunway and my mom brought me to this shop which sells really cute novelty items. I was checking out the bracelets they had there and this very tall guy in a black shirt stood next to me. Awkward, I thought. Nonetheless, I carried on with my business of browsing through over-priced costume jewelery. When I turned around to retrieve my phone from my bag, I accidentally, I swear accidentally, nudged him with my elbow. Before I could make eye contact with him and apologize, he was already smiling.

Things started to get really weird.

"Sorry", I said and hastily walked beside my sister who was checking out mini musical machines. With much of my attention focused on rolling the knob which makes the music, tall black shirt guy walked pass me and 'accidentally' nudged me on my arm.

"Sorry", he said with the most horniest grin I have ever seen. =____________=

He seriously thought I was hitting on him.

Anyway, I played with a gyroscope or better known as NSD POWERBALL in the shop. It costs about a 100 bucks but daaaaamn its addictive. And it hurts like crap after a while.

Another mindfucking machine.

I caught the end of the 5th Malaysia National Figure Skating Championship there as well. There were flexible little girls standing all together in short short body hugging dresses. All I could think about was Hanson. Hahaha. :D

The other day, my grandma was in my house watching MTV or some other music channel when Lady GaGa's Telephone video was on.

Me: *in cantonese* Grandma, her body is so hot right?

She laughed and said yes hahahaaha.

Till then.

Regarding the statement below,

I HATE PEOPLE

Of course, that is probably the brash way to say it. For me, I pretty much dislike assholes. Assholes, which sums up 95% of this god forsaken world (and the people I know). For the ones who doesn't like explaining themselves, the sentence above works. Sure, what kind of people?

People who have zero gratification of any sort, for one. People who enjoy going on AWOL and expect to be hunted down. People, who are too much of a big gaping vagina, to pick up the phone and bloody call once in a while. People who jump to conclusions before they understand the situation. People who don't face the situation like a man. People who don't appreciate.

Damn I can go on and on.

So friends, to conclude my ever redundant message, please refer to the statement in bright bold letters.

I don't need.

Till then.

Bring me to the Gallows

Have you ever twisted your ankle? Sure it hurts like hell for a few days then it heals. But from time to time, it just comes back to haunt you, like a nagging, blunt sensation all the way up to your shin. It sucks man.

So I attended Sports Day today. To be completely honest with you guys, I was a tad disappointed. I shall spare you the details because I'm just so lazy to talk shit about people these days. Yes.. lazy. Actually, more like sick and tired of it. If you haven't noticed, it's always the same story playing on replay.

Now, after sitting under direct sunlight for half an hour, the shade of my skin tone is AWFUL. My forearms are dark as hell while my legs are... well they weren't exposed so I guess they're normal. I look like I dipped my arms in a tub of chocolate.

Oh well, at least I make a beautiful chocolate person nontheless. :P

Till then.

Never too late to start

Hello friends.

I want all of you to meet this supercentenarian named Elizabeth Bolden. She was born on 15 August 1890 and passed away on 11th December 2006, which makes her 116 years and 118days old. Sure, not the oldest person ever but here is why she really fascinates me:-

"Lizzie married Lewis Bolden circa 1908 and their first child, a son named Ezell, was born on September 21st 1909. She had seven children in total, only two of whom were still alive at the time of her death in 2006.

In addition to Lizzie’s seven children she had 40 grand-children, 75 great grand-children, 150 great-great grand-children, 220 great-great-great grand-children and 75 great-great-great-great grand-children. Geez, imagine Christmas at granny’s house."

This is Jeanne Calment. 21st February 1875 – 4th August 1997 Age: 122 years 164 days

What's incredible is that Calment met Vincent Van Gogh in 1888 when he came to her father’s shop to buy some paint and pencils. She described him as dirty, badly dressed and disagreeable. She remembers this visit clearly along with watching the Eiffel tower being built.

She was the last person living to have personally met the artist.She smoked right up until she was 117. Calment ascribed her longevity and youthful looks to olive oil. She rubbed it on her skin, drank it and used it in cooking. She enjoyed port wine and ate almost one kilogram (2.2lbs) of chocolate per week.

At age 85 Jeanne took up fencing and at age 100 she was still riding a bicycle.

Yeah I don't know why I'm blogging about old people. Much less read about them. I just find them incredible interesting. A granny that can smoke up to a right age of 100 can beat superman's tight ass anyday.

Btw, this is real book.

Till then.

source: listverse