April 23, 2010

So you think you're cool huh

Oh gosh. I think this post has been long overdue. It's about Facebook! Yeah I know you crackheads have been expecting this shit from me, especially from me and you're just holding your big pile of anticipation right under your collective bosoms.

Ah yes, Facebook. The name itself is a mystery, much less the people who use it. Why Facebook? I had the weirdest visual when I first heard it on the radio somewhere. I mean, we had Friendster in the good ol' days which I have an account on (no I am not linking it) but after sometime, some chinese with tits for a brain decided it was cool to post up pictures of themselves cutting their wrists like moronic suicidal failures. No, seriously. It's not cool to show people what you spend your time doing using that sad excuse for a brain. How you take pictures of only your big cute eyes and none of your face. Why would I wanna look at pictures of eyes? Especially when you get a little too happy with your black eyeliner. And what's with the bleeding wrists? Dude, if you really want hits on your profile, a picture of your attempting suicide by shoving jellybeans and bleach down your throat with a fork have a much better chance compared with a picture of you with a bleeding wrist. It's such a vagina thing to do.

So Friendster I view no more.

Anyway, back to the topic. I succumbed into the pressure of having high-school friends and made myself an account to see what's the hype about. I mean, I heard of people actually staying up all night just to see updates on their friends. How caring! :)

Yeah so at first, when you don't have a lot of people to stalk, or what they call friends, its really boring. As in REALLY boring. All I did was stare at my profile and the only thing I had in my mind was WHATAFACK AM I DOING? Uh huh but it gets better because there are fan pages. Oh how I love the fan pages. Its actually very entertaining to watch your friends 'Become A Fan' of the RANDOMEST things.

Here's one I just had to laugh at:
*Looks in freezer, "OMG ICE CREAM!! ;D", *opens, "W.T.H? CHICKEN? D:<.."

Sure there are other stupid ones that can only be a product of a pre-pubescent hormonal 13 year old that puzzles me. Why would you want to become a fan of something like THAT? *RAGE* Like, "Saying it's fine when I'm not". How can you actually be a fan of THAT? Basically, you're just advertising how often you lie. Now, when I want to express my concern to someone I have to think twice because he/she just became a fan of saying it's fine when they're not.

"Stop teasing Justin Bieber. She has feelings too" This is so bull. Maybe I'm being biased because his songs are painfully catchy but come on. He ain't that bad. He's young and enjoying his life. Just because you fail at whatever he's doing doesn't mean you have to hate. There are always other things you can do like using your powerful foreign language skills to become a dishwasher at some fancy hotel.


Till then.

April 21, 2010

I am recycling emotions

There's one thing I really enjoy doing which is torturing myself watching old school romantic movies. I will sit on the couch with a cup of hot chocolate and a box full of tissues, anticipating the sob moments where I will cry my eyes out as I relate my life with theirs. I should feel shitty after crying over some poor sap's pathetic love life which is fictional but oddly, I'll feel really glad. Just happy. Just as simple as that... happy.

These movies really make you think.
So do sappy love songs.

Till then.

April 18, 2010

Staring at the carnage

First off, I want to say thank you for making me such a significance in your bleak and miserable life. I apologize because I cannot reciprocate your waves of emotions because I lack your mental retardation. Your impossible delusions of power and superiority have made me realize how much of a degenerate you really are. Oh, so you are hating on me? Well, bravo, I say to you with outstanding enthusiasm. I never did realize as somehow, I grew fond of your idiocy that I must say... is spreading like plague. Now, you cannot say I don't understand your hatred for me because I have been pondering about it a lot. Would you look at that?! I was THINKING about where your mental incapacity originated from. Maybe its your unusual blend of proteins and nucleotides in your DNA that makes you particularly vexatious. Perhaps its the impossible amount of pressure on your shoulders from being so insecure. Oh, how I pity. :(

Really, the things I hear you say about me is very amusing. I enjoy being placed on such a high pedestal and be thought of so much. My very presence bothers you! Do I really posses such a powerful aura where merely walking pass you across the halls strikes such a chord in you? Jealousy is a poison, my friend. I don't even need to lift a finger where you, on the other hand, gather your little two-faced companions to waste your breath discussing about how you abhor my ways. So you say I have changed. Have I changed into something better than you? Personally, I don't think I have changed. I still like licking the cream off oreos before eating the cookie. And if you repulse the way I am, why not talk to me? Do I instill such an amount of fear in you?

At the beginning, I have thought of making peace with you. But after much consideration, I realize degenerates like yourself have a mindset of an anus where all you ever will do is give people shit. What would confronting you do? Nothing, I say because you hate me and no matter what I do or say, you will still dislike my ways. So, my efforts will be futile. I have better things to do than care about what you say about me. I understand completely, how bleak your life is now. You just need something to make your day in school a lot more interesting, no? Well, if it does give you such satisfaction because you are just so incompetent like that, I shall not stop you. I am contented with the way I am and I don't need such adolescent, Hannah Montana kind of issues to get me through the day. At least when I dislike something or someone, I am consistent about it and not drift with wind of hypocrisy.

You entertain me. To watch your face distort in such a way when I walk pass you in the halls.

I laugh at you.

Till then.

April 13, 2010

Howdy Ya'll

So I was on my way home from school. In the car, I was enjoying the peaceful, though sometimes redundant music playing on the radio to match the somber drifting scenery. It rained, so everything looked extra depressing. Out of the blue, a car goes VRROM VROOM behind me. OBVIOUSLY the sound is to attract attention but all I saw driving pass me was shit on wheels. It sounds impressive, yeah but it looked like shit. Seriously. Fake headlight stickers. Like WHUT? How is that in anyway badass?

Geez, my hairdryer sounds as good and looks so much better.

Till then.

April 10, 2010

Hot blooded

Is it some untold aphorism that one can never really use up an eraser? Maybe it's just me but I think I have used up to five million erasers so far. Every time I buy an eraser or two, it either goes missing, breaks apart or vandalized by me. The fact that I like expensive erasers doesn't help as well. When I actually think about it, I've never really completely use up ONE eraser at a time. It's pathetic. Something so simple, cannot be done. I know, I know. Why am I talking about erasers when some fat diabetic kid who's eating a twinkie just passed out watching TwiFag somewhere.

When I was younger, I'd believe that someone out there is doing the exact same thing as I. It's pretty cool, really.

I'd also believe that someone would look very similar to me. Actually, I've come across this 'OSHIT-THAT-KID-LOOKS-LIKE-ME' situation once or twice. Once, I was in McD with my family when I saw the rear of a chubby lil' girl in a pink shirt and too tight gray pants. When she turned around, she looked like how I did when I was younger. Damn I only thought of one thing. I can't imagine how many retinas I've burnt just exposing my fat ass to the world. Sigh. Please don't bring your children out if Santa's going to drop them a treadmill on Christmas. The worst part is, I always thought I looked so fly with mah bell bottoms and over sized trainers. I would kill me back then.

Till then.

April 8, 2010

Bury all your secrets in my skin

So I'm reading Interview With The Vampire (finally) and it's just overwhelming. I can't explain the emotions that birth within me when I read the beauty and devastation of being a vampire. Louis, for one, is just a shattered shell, hollow to the bone. I have fallen in love with this particular character. Maybe because Anne Rice tore the words from my chest and turned it into his song, exactly the way I would sing it.

This is the real shit, my friends.

Till then.

April 6, 2010

Rooftop Blues

Till then.

April 4, 2010


Yesterday, I was in Sunway and my mom brought me to this shop which sells really cute novelty items. I was checking out the bracelets they had there and this very tall guy in a black shirt stood next to me. Awkward, I thought. Nonetheless, I carried on with my business of browsing through over-priced costume jewelery. When I turned around to retrieve my phone from my bag, I accidentally, I swear accidentally, nudged him with my elbow. Before I could make eye contact with him and apologize, he was already smiling.

Things started to get really weird.

"Sorry", I said and hastily walked beside my sister who was checking out mini musical machines. With much of my attention focused on rolling the knob which makes the music, tall black shirt guy walked pass me and 'accidentally' nudged me on my arm.

"Sorry", he said with the most horniest grin I have ever seen. =____________=

He seriously thought I was hitting on him.

Anyway, I played with a gyroscope or better known as NSD POWERBALL in the shop. It costs about a 100 bucks but daaaaamn its addictive. And it hurts like crap after a while.

Another mindfucking machine.

I caught the end of the 5th Malaysia National Figure Skating Championship there as well. There were flexible little girls standing all together in short short body hugging dresses. All I could think about was Hanson. Hahaha. :D

The other day, my grandma was in my house watching MTV or some other music channel when Lady GaGa's Telephone video was on.

Me: *in cantonese* Grandma, her body is so hot right?

She laughed and said yes hahahaaha.

Till then.

April 1, 2010

So I can fall asleep tonight

Hey there,
I know it's hard to feel like I don't care at all.
Where you are and how you feel.
With these lights off as these wheels
keep rolling on and on.
Slow things down or speed them up.
Not enough or way too much.
How are you when I'm gone?

And I can't make it on my own.
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.

Spare me just three last words.
"I love you" is all she heard.
I'll wait for you, but I can't wait forever.

-Ohio is for lovers