November 23, 2009

Ugly Kids

I remember I had to walk from Sungei Wang all the way to Pavilion once. So, the route required us to walk pass a Maybank with a pretty spacey area around it. Yep, on that very sunny day, there were a crowd of maybe 40-50 kids in ugly checkered shirts and hideous accessories just sitting around and all I could think of at that moment was 'What in God's name are you people doing?' Pardon my curiosity but I really want to know. I mean, the sun was blazing because I felt like I was about to have a heat stroke just waiting for the little green man to appear on the traffic light. These kids were just sitting around in groups with their mp3s, under the sun, doing nothing.

But, I still had to cross the road, leaving my thoughts behind with them hip teenagers wasting away under the baking sun. I continued on into the shopping mall, minding my own business and all. Then I noticed a group of boys in very very tight pants. Geez, just looking at them made my legs hurt. Doesn't their crotch hurt when the walk? Because from what I observed, their pants look 3 times smaller than its actual size. Constriction to a whole new level. Kids these days with the clothes they wear. It's painful to even look. Its either too short, too tight or just plain ugly.

Besides attempting suicide in those pants, they wear their distasteful sunglasses that shields half their face. Indoors. WHAT THE HELL? The name itself gives you an idea WHEN and WHERE to wear it. SUN-glasses. Function? To protect your dainty eyes from the glaring SUN. Do you find that in a mall? NO. Question. Why do they do it? Are they just too daft to realize how vile they look? Do they intend to pick up some chicks? WHAT GIRL WOULD BE INTERESTED IF SHE CANT SEE YOUR BLOODY FACE? Doesn't help when you walk around like you're on drugs.

What I notice about these hip youngsters these days are their cool DSLRs around their puny necks. I was at the food court when I noticed this bunch. So I watched how they swing their cameras around with such 'swagger'. Hello children. What is a function of a camera? To take/snap pictures. What is a function of a camera to a half-baked teenager? It's an over-priced accessory.

When I see someone wearing crocs, I know immediately that fellow croc-wearer and I have nothing in common. An unusual impulse of rage fuels my body and I will feel like pushing fellow croc-wearer down, punch his face in and scream at his loathsome fashion sense. I was in the pharmacy today and I saw a little stand that holds these grotesque shoes. Wow, people actually dedicate space to sell pairs of shit for 130 bucks. It prevents bad odor and fungal growth. It also prevents you from being socially relevant. I wouldn't even want engage a conversation someone who looks like they have Miley Cyrus on their feet, much less go out with them. There are no words in the dictionary to describe the monstrosity of Crocs. All I know its synonyms are somewhere about repulsive, appalling, deformed and grotesque.

Burn this pair of shit with holes you call shoes.

I may not be Paris Hilton when it comes to fashion but at least I can differentiate between decent and straight-up ugly.

If you find yourself wearing crocs or practicing any of the above, please kill yourself, thank you.


Till then.

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